interview

My cousin Maresi sent me ten interview questions to answer. In exchange, I sent her ten questions to answer. Here are my answers. Go here to see her answers to my questions.

1. Tell me three moments in your life that were DEFINING, that without those moments occurring, you wouldn't be who you are today.

The first one is easy. My brother's death. Losing him changed me profoundly and deeply in ways that I don't even know how to express. Past that, it takes a lot more thought, because there are so many people in my life that have changed me and shaped me and that is bigger than any specific moment. But I'm going to take the question at its word, and leave it at specific moments.

So the second one would probably be a meeting I had with my professor and mentor in college, Jim, who I am happy to now call a friend. The meeting where I made the agonizing decision to drop music therapy as my major and forge forward into the world of performance and composition, which would leave me with nothing but a big unknown after college. He said, "Go with your heart, and the rest will fall into place."

The third moment is when I realized, senior year in high school, that I actually have great hair. Sounds shallow, I know, but I struggled with a terrible self-image and constant abuse from classmates about my hair from first grade all the way through school. Learning how to manage my hair and embrace it, rather than seeing it as a source of endless humiliation, gave me confidence and changed my entire viewpoint of myself and others.

2. Cliche, but you... Deserted island... What article of clothing, simple tool and luxury item do you choose?

sundress, fishing spear, iphone

3. Where would you like to travel next?

Mike and I are discussing this at the moment actually! We've been torn between going out west again to a different national park, or going to Morocco, or going to Costa Rica. It looks like Costa Rica will probably win out this year. I'd love to go to Morocco but the tours we'd probably be interested in, due to the fact that we're totally unfamiliar with the area, are really expensive. So that one's taking a back burner for now.

4. Tell me how you would handle $1,000,000 - tax free.

It's funny you should mention that, since my co-workers and I are in it to win it with 206 chances for the Mega Millions drawing tonight - $171 million (we won some money in Tuesday's drawing and reinvested it). Wouldn't be tax-free, but it would be more than $1 million each. I'll let you know next week how I've decided to spend the winnings.

5. You've gone through more sadness in the last 3-4 years than most people do in a lifetime. Understandably and legitimately, there must be days where you want to crawl in a hole and shut down completely. What/who, if anything/one, keeps you from doing that?

There are days where I want to do that. There are also days, or mostly just portions of days, where that is exactly what I do. I think taking the time-outs and allowing myself to do exactly that for small amounts of time is what keeps me from sinking into a depression.

Of course, without Mike, without my parents, without my cousins, without a few close friends who keep me sane, I have no confidence whatsoever that I would be able to control it and move forward as well as I do. I have an amazing support system.

And in case anyone reading this is unaware, Maresi is referring to the death of my brother in April 2006, the death of Mamie, my dad's mom (with whom I was very close), in March 2006, and the death of our nephew, Noah (Mike's sister's son) in December 2005, as well as the deaths of Mike's grandmother, his grandfather, and his uncle within the last couple of years.

6. What is your favorite word?

Vacation

Least favorite word?

Work

7. What is your idea of a perfect day?

I couldn't possibly pinpoint a perfect day. I want to be 47 places at once. I am always thinking about time I wish I could talking with family and friends I don't see enough and time I wish I could spend alone to practice for hours and time I wish I could spend reading and time I wish I could spend doing absolutely nothing with Mike, just enjoying each other's company, and time I wish I could spend getting to know all over again people I used to know everything about and time I wish I could spend playing board games with my cousins and time I wish I could spend talking to my gram about her whole life, soaking it all in and really getting to know her and time I wish I could spend scrapbooking and time I wish I could spend writing and time I wish I could spend singing and time I wish I could spend volunteering to help anyone and everyone with whatever they need and do you get the point yet? I am all over the place and want to do everything. I think the moral of the story is, I don't have time to work for a living, I have too many things to do!

Actually, come to realize it, see #4. It seems this is how I would spend my million!

8. What is your favorite book of all time?

Right now? Water for Elephants. But get ready for it to change at any moment. I love books.

9. Your parents have said often how they knew Mike would be your husband that first day of college. When did YOU know Mike would be your husband?

It happened so naturally that I never even had a realization. Our relationship, even back in college, was so easy and so natural that we just drifted in that direction. And we both knew it without even having to discuss it. And by it I mean the fact that we would get married. The timing and logistics of it, that we discussed. In great detail. And with much contention. But it all worked out.

10. Who is your favorite character on LOST? It's Desmond, isn't it? ISN'T IT?!?

If we're talking about favorite as in someone I wouldn't mind moving onto that desert island from #2 with, Sayid.

If we're talking about favorite as in most fascinating character to watch, we have a four-way tie between Ben, Faraday, Charlotte and Richard Alpert.

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Thanks, Maresi! This was fun.

If you have a blog and want to get in on the fun, leave a comment asking me to interview you and I'll send you ten questions to answer.